The Why

Why? Why are you willing to degrade yourself? Why insult yourself? Why put out personal information? Why? Why? Why?

Well, first I do not think I am degrading myself with calling this the blog Fat Man Running. It is just the truth. I could use technical terms. But those terms are not the truth. I am fat. I am not completely comfortable with myself yet. I do not think I could go on TLC or another reality television show about being fat. I do not think I would be comfortable on Biggest Loser. I am not even comfortable out on the streets in running clothes. But, I have come to terms with the reality that I am fat. So, not a problem. 

The other information in the blog about depression and Bi-Polar is not really private. Yes, it is not the kind of information you just put in a conversation over small talk. I should be allowed to tell others about the life I live outside the walls of protection. I erected protective masks for a long time. I still do as a matter of fact. There are days I would rather stay home unwashed watching TV with nothing to think or feel. I still go forth and attempt to accomplish activities. Then there are times I cannot keep from racing. Again, a different mask is put on to attempt to look "normal" to others. I want to be one of the people in a position to make mental health a topic we can openly discus and end the shame.

In the end, all of this blog is an effort to be real. And, I am not really doing it for others to read. If I was than I would promote it more on Facebook and other locations. I would seek out money from sponsors (I am sure I could find a few after I got some stats). and other work. I am doing this as a way of holding myself accountable. I hope that this resource will be a ways to keep me going after the last race and looking for the next race. 

If you found this blog, you are looking in the right place for something special. I hope you will find it with God's help.